Pricing Mistake #5
Women’s Most Common Pricing Mistakes
I did an interview today for my friend, Thom Stimpel’s Entrepreneurs’ Guild podcast. He began by asking me what my biggest mistake was starting out as an entrepreneur. Without much hesitation, I told him not asking for help as a result of feeling unworthy.
It wasn’t about not feeling worthy of getting help but fearful that I would be exposed and revealed as not knowing enough, not smart enough, not being worthy of being in business, a fraud.
I had always felt, albeit unconsciously, that to have a business I needed to know everything there was about my field. To ask for help would be an omission of my holes, my gaps, my lack, my flaws.
Ugh. I still get a sick feeling in my gut just thinking about that time.
As a result, again unconsciously, my most common pricing mistake back then was #5 which is very common for many entrepreneurs starting out, particularly women.
I remember my son’s second grade teacher, Mrs. French, at the time telling me,
“Dear, don’t give your talents away.”
She clearly saw something in me I didn’t.
Boy, those 2nd grade teachers… they are gems! Such vision and insight into both kids and parents! Teachers Rock!!
It took me years though before I was able to stop giving my work away for free and it was all attached to my sense of worth (or lack thereof), my need to be liked, and definitely a people pleasing thing (ahhh… my Nurturer personality).
The dreaded Disease to Please festers into Common Mistake #5 - Working for Free for Too Long.
However, it’s never enough to simply say you are no longer going to work for free. You need to set a new intention. A very conscious and deliberate one.
An example:
Oprah did an interview in which she talks about her Disease to Please.
She didn’t understand why she would give and give and give and people would keep coming back for more. She thought she had given enough. However it wasn’t until she realized the real reason behind her actions of giving was to be liked, not necessarily to be respected or valued, that things changed.
“People kept coming back for more because that was the unconscious intention I had set - to be liked. Once I changed my intention for giving the result changed.”
When we become conscious and clear in our intentions we’re able to set boundaries and clearly communicate them without guilt, fear, or resentment - with our heads held high radiating respect for ourselves and our work.
Be prepared that some people may be disappointed when you change your intentions. They won’t understand why you “have changed” and may not like the new you. However, those are the Naysayers and they will always have their own agenda.
The people who will never be disappointed are your True Believers and they will cheer you on as you rise to your brilliance.
“Working for free tells a lie about what you are worth.”
If you’ve been working for free for too long it’s time to correct it - otherwise you’re just a Volunteer.
Step 1: Explore your unconscious intentions of why you’re working for free.
Step 2: Define 3 clear intentions of why you would give or do something for free.
Step 3: Tell someone in your business circle what those intentions are. (That’s helps to make it feel real and actionable.)
Get your worthy up Girl and live your light!
